The Insecure Writers Support Group
Earlier this year, I joined Alex Cavanaugh’s monthly blog hop, The Insecure Writers Support Group, aimed at providing a once monthly post and hop where writers can talk about their fears, concerns and offer support to fellow writers. My first and only post was a decision that it wasn’t for me at that time. It was all a matter of perception for me you see. I didn’t want to be seen as insecure. I didn’t want anyone to see that I was fallible. Especially not those who could, potentially, at some point, be interested in my work. This all changed a couple of weeks ago when I decided that the person behind my writing, me, has to be honest and genuine and not be swayed by the view I was seeing, looking up at those I was aspiring to be like. The post where I make this decision and stand is here.
It all seems quite timely now, considering all the talk on the internet about sockpuppeteering. A dishonest practice where published authors have been found to have not only have been giving themselves rave Amazon reviews, but also trying to bring the average reviews down of fellow authors, by leaving slating one star reviews. The anger and activity this has sparked has led to press interest, pushed largely by the activity of fury and outrage of fellow authors.
For me, it has led to a desire to pull away a little from the idea of where I wanted to be. As a writer. Yes, I absolutely still want to write and I still want to have readers. I have more ideas running through my head than I have time to deal with. I want to sit behind my laptop and type. What I have concerns about is joining the ranks of being a published author.
My Twitter timeline has been the most ridiculously stressful place recently. It’s full of anger and it’s constant, and while I understand that it is important in the world of writing and publishing, and yes, it is the livelihoods of some authors, the incessant anger and tunnel vision is making my head hurt. It absolutely is important that writers play by the rules and are fair and leave other writers to get on with their work, but what’s that phrase… sticks and stones…
Tell me my words are crap and yes it will hurt, I’ve been slaving over them for what feels like a lifetime, but if you tell me my words are crap, as long as there wasn’t a literal knife in your hand and you didn’t just stick it in my gut, then really, don’t read anything else I write. I have a job I love. A career. I see people really getting hurt and I don’t see this level of drama surrounding it. People need to take a step back and breath a minute.
Anyway, my point in this post is that I’m actually beginning to become afraid of becoming a published writer. I’m not sure I want to join a world that can’t see past the keyboard, where colleagues contractual disciplinary errors are played out so vividly and so emotionally in such a public way. Social networking is a place without boundaries and as long as you believe you are in the right, you can use it at will to wield whatever big stick you feel like. There is immense power within Twitter and I’m not sure people realise just how much.
I want to write, but I’m afraid of what becoming published will do to me.
There are spaces available for guest posts on Mondays. If you’re interested in guest posting on the blog, please get in touch with me via email. rebecca.bradley2010@gmailcom